297,500

Do you know what that number represents? NO! I wish that were my income for this first half of 2008. LOL That huge number represents the approximate number of excess calories that I have consumed in the last 3 years to gain 85 pounds. After doing some more numbers crunching, I have figured that I have consumed an average of 272 extra calories than my body needs in a day. That seems like a small number of calories alone, but compounded over 3 years, that has made a SIGNIFICANT difference in my life. Eight-five pounds of significance. 271 calories= 2 Tbs of peanut butter and a slice of bread, a bowl of cereal with milk.. That kind of extra intake of food (a light meal) has kept me an obese woman.

Doing this kind of numbers crunching has made me open my eyes to see that the small snacks/meals do add up to matter. I am going to start to journal my food intake to get an idea of my caloric intake as it stands and then work from there.

Drive 55 (pounds that is) to Stay Alive

Last night, it donned on me. My goal of 85 pounds lost seems to overwhelming. So much so that I can seem to get myself started. I know what the experts say, make smaller, achievable goals that will lead up to your ultimate goal to give yourself smaller, regular successes. Well, as you see that is not an approach that I can sink my teeth into. I've decided that losing 55 pounds would make me quite happy. I was looking at older photos and I must admit that I look "healthy" at 180. I definitely look quite fit at 155, but trying to get there from here seems too tough right now.

I am excited about 55 pounds lost and 180 as a goal weight. When I get closer, I can always re-assess and decided then what I'd like to do.

I have had a great week energy-wise. Not in the sense of lack of energy, but in the sense that I am feeling great. I am feeling more closely to my 'divine' self. I feel connected to so many people right now. It feels wonderful. I also feel that I am at a point that I am able to welcome a partner into my life again. I feel that I can offer a lot more than I have felt in the recent past. My mojo is coming back.

Funny enough, this morning on the bus, there was a guy that I've seen a few times on the bus that decided to talk to me this morning. Did I just become visible again? I have told my friends many times in the past that we are able to control our energy and have people enter or retract from our personal circle. I proved that to myself this morning. As a matter of fact, I've had a lot of nice conversations with men these last few days since starting to feel better. Interesting.

So, back to my re-vamped goal. I am going to create a simple plan of action. Ha ha! That's me...simple plans...YEAH RIGHT! However, I do have some ideas of what I want to do to keep myself focused, on track and getting the weight off as fast as safely possible.